Friday, March 02, 2007

Story Time On The Carpet

Well, it's just me sitting on the carpet, telling myself a story - about a story that I want to write. Friday night, I mean where else would I choose to be, but in flannel pyjamas, sitting here typing away - sod the clubs and bars, from here I can go anywhere.

The Pheonix and The Carpet did that.

The Box of Delights had some kind of magical music that made all seem at peace in the world.

Oh, perhaps the self induced nostalgia might have something to do with having been at a Writing For Kids workshop today, discussing, in part why, you can't write kids books like that any longer, and finding out the clues for cracking the code to get past the 'Gate Keepers' - parents, teachers and psychologists... A milion and one, very much loved, books would never have got written in todays PC world.

PC - Police Constable Righteousness.

or, PC world - a place to buy computer things, where the staff are as holographic as the adverts.

It was a really good workshop.

But, PC-ness is out there pissing on the leg of manuscripts that see any child hero/ine even talking to stangers, investigating abandoned aeroplanes in fields, going out on a boat with out responsible named adult and full safety equipment .

Argh - that is what let the ultra-smug-should-get-a-job-and-stop-making-normal-people-look-silly-for-being-normal Annabel Car(bet it's a 4x4 really)michael woman onto the bookshelves. She should be pureed and placed in one of her own stupid freezer containers (I read a chapter at my sister in laws house, she doesn't like her buggy going on the beach because it cost more than 'most peoples cars'...Nuff said). On a similar note, can someone please bake Nigella-would-she-be-anywhere-without-a-politic-Dad-Lawson in one of her own (branded) muffin tins.

Lip gloss cookie bakers, should be enmeshed in their wicker baskets and have a facial in their moulinex.

Why the rant? For some reason their names were mentioned at the end of the day, and the ensuing gremlins unleash themselves onto this page. Should I feel inadequate because I just made my son boiled eggs and soldiers - rather than arranging broccoli florettes like a forest, on a coulis of bullshit, with a pizza face, on homemade bloody dough bases.

If I listened to those two, then yes I should.

Which kind of brings me full circle. The Famous Five ate boiled eggs, and had adventures without adequate adult supervision.


Occasional Poster of Comments said...

Was that today? Bugger.

Anyway, you're absolutely right. Loads of the books I remember from childhood involved kids either disobeying their parents, doing (so called) dangerous things on their own, or usually both at once. And that's why we liked them so much.

Plus, boiled eggs and soldiers: what would childhood be without them?

miss-cellany said...

They must still disobey, and cannot be perfect. BUT all visits must now be risk assessed for potential dangers and insurance purposes...

(on behalf of the publisher rather than the writer I assume)